Moving the Goalpost
There’s a sense of urgency that comes after achieving something you’ve wanted for a long time. You’d expect celebration, a break, or at least satisfaction with yourself. But sometimes, the respite is fleeting. Maybe you’ll feel a moment of contentment followed by the pressure to look for what’s next.
For as long as I can remember, I’ve been pretty ambitious. There’s always been a goal: get excellent grades, go to a prestigious program, win awards, do whatever a model student would, and even learn not one, but several languages in my free time. I move through life as if there’s a finish line, but the truth is, every time I reach that imaginary goal, it disappears. Another one further along appears. And I start running again.
Price
High expectations have a cost. When you tie your worth and self-image to your accomplishments or your progress, it’s hard to feel like you’re enough. There’s always someone doing more, achieving more impressive feats, and being more successful, and if you’re not careful, that comparison messes with your mind. Even worse, the pressure to constantly improve can start to replace the joy you’d normally feel for a goal. You stop doing things because they’re fun, and you start doing them because they’re useful or impressive.
Shift
It’s good to have goals. It’s good to want to grow. But at some point, we have to ask ourselves why we do the things we do. What do we expect to happen by pursuing this goal? What are we really hoping to feel once we get them?
Sometimes it feels like no goal, no matter how impressive, is enough to permanently satisfy you. If you don’t learn to feel content now, it’s unlikely that reaching your next goal will make everything feel more complete. Fulfillment doesn’t automatically appear when you reach an arbitrary point.
Maybe, we don’t have to keep moving and keep striving. Maybe, we need to be more present and more satisfied with ourselves rather than constantly chasing some future dream. Because if you’re always chasing, always running, you may have to run a lot of steps, very likely more than you’re able to. So maybe we can still chase dreams, but maybe we should know when to stop. Do it with joy. Do it while keeping in mind that life isn’t just about what we achieve. It’s also about how we feel along the way.
Life Update!
HCSSiM is an interesting experience, It’s hard to believe it’s over halfway done, but I’ve been able to deal with it. Maybe, death is but the next greatest adventure, and the dreaded moment two weeks from now is just the mark of a new beginning. Maybe, instead of ruminating, I can enjoy the present and the little time I have left with my friends. Since growing old is inevitable, but growing mature is a choice.
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